100 Miles of Forest Park?!

Good day Team Seagal fans. Thank you for your attention, we must detail an absurd feat as completed by two of your favorite cycling comrades:


This event took place last Friday, the 11th of January 2008. Earlier in the week, Dr. McLaren and I developed a truly super non-race course, tracing some 4.2 miles through the streets of Forest Park. Our route is highlighted on the following grainy map:

Here is a description using words of the 100 Miles of Forest Park Super NON-race Course:

Find the start / finish point at the bottom of Art Hill, go ahead and climb that to begin. Hang a left at the Zoo, pass the Worlds Fair/ Spanish Pavilion, make a right at The Muny roundabout and ascend McKinley Street up past The Jewel Box. Hang a left, pass some ball fields, The Mounted Police Stables and finally The Planetarium. Make another left to cruise past Jefferson Lake, do not disturb the busy fisherman. Follow the road, it curves back to the west passing the MO History Museum, the course regenerates itself as you return to the bottom of Art Hill.

Dr. McLaren and I completed 21+ laps of this Forest Park Super NON-race Course. We had a Garmin GPS unit so our progress was tracked by satellites in space - very fancy. In the middle of lap 12 we decided it was time for some lunch so we left Forest Park and rode to Legrand's Deli in south City. We enjoyed sandwiches and a can each of Steven Seagal's own Cherry Charge flavoured Lightning Bolt energy elixir, a natural energy drink packed with vitamins and exotic botanicals. We then returned to Forest Park and continued riding in circles until the odometer read 100.

Would you like to meet the bikes we were riding that day? Allow me to introduce Dr. McLaren's '88 Schwinn Tempo.

Check out that stylish head tube, this man has some serious team spirit!

Orange bikes are exciting to me, I was riding this Milwaukee Orange One.

Both of our bikes were set-up as single speeds because we like to coast, both bikes shared the same gearing of 42 x 16. In addition, we were both rolling on new wheelsets prescribed and built by the crafty Dr. McLaren himself. In fact, The Dr.'s new wheels are so fancy they deserve a mention. He's got Campy Chorus 9/10 spd hubs laced to 32H Velocity Aerohead rims with Wheelsmith bladed spokes. He had to hand mill cassette spacers to fit the funky Campy spline when fine-tuning the chainline on the Tempo. You can tell in this photo he is very pleased with the outcome:

I, Nico Toscani, am also very pleased with my new wheels. Take a look at my ghost picture:

Thanks for your patience and your thoughtful consideration for our team blog. Come back again soon to learn of the next Team Seagal adventure, possibly in progress right now!


Boz said...

And all this time, I thought I was nuts for doing a 50 miler in Queeny Park one morning!

Mr. Ryback said...

I think this speaks quite well to Nico and Wesley's superior attitude and superior state of mind.

Robert T. Metz said...

Is the Doctor packing heat in his picture? Fopo is dangerous but not for two highly skilled SS'ers

Davey B said...

i admire and respect all Seagulls.

having said that, that is the dumbest fucking thing i have ever heard.

superiorly retarded. add that to your tag line.

fucking bike club said...

hey eddie, its michael bussmann, out here in america's wild west. how is it going?
send me an email, ive got an event that you guys should be a part of.

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