20090121

Chubb Trail aka Storm the Bear mauled a tree, and then killed it on the trail while Nico Toscani rode a Mario Van Peebles Flint Quarry lap!

Salutations and a hearty hello to you, the loyal Team Seagal fan. This week has been great! Me, Mason Storm, and my Nose Neighbor cashed in on the generous outside-temperature stimulus program initiated early this week by Mother Nature herself- even she thought last week's sub zero lows and single-digit highs was teh bull-shits.

War Games were promptly scheduled at Chubb as training is underway for two highly anticipated tests of power, will, and one's ability to inflict general wrist-carnage upon their opposistion. First on the calender is Steve and Gina Driscoll' s Tour De Groundhog taking place February 17th in Williamsville, IL. Second is the Inaugural Bone Bender 3hr / 6hr on March 14th in Smithville, MO. Bone Bender promises to be a "3/6 Hour Mountain Bike Odyssey in Paradise." Based on the promoters reputation, I believe this to be a true statement. It will be the first endurance MTB race of the 2009 season for most of us here at Team Seagal HQ, we are getting quite excited to test our early season form.

Back to getting Chubby, Mason must have thought he was driving a D9 Caterpillar instead of his Big Unit as he tried his hand at Logging within the first 10 minutes of our ride at Chubb the other day. We descended from Lone Elk, crossed the first set of railroad tracks and followed the new "line" down and up through the rocky creek bed. We were moving with great momentum through the twisty dips and tight single track approaching the rock garden. Mason dropped into one steep dip a little too fast and as he launched out the other side I swear I heard him cry "Awww man, I'm coming in hot!" Storm said he blinked hard once and then his whole field of vision was crowded with nothing but the trunk of a mature tree. He slammed into that tree trunk and then just pressed "eject." The bike / back hoe stopped completely and Mason's body deflected off into space as he transitioned into an expertly executed akido roll that would have made the master shed a poignant tear. When Mason stood next he was several yards further down trail than his bicycle. I was right there on the scene but this guy was already picking the leaves out of his helmet...

The ensuing display of Superior Attitude and Superior State of Mind was truly something to behold. Mason confessed that he felt slightly concussed, but that the day was too nice to ditch this ride so early in. We were fortunate to continue on without incident, separating only briefly so I could battle the rocky accent of the Flint Quarry section.

The following footage depicts proof of victory on the front lines. Riding on the Chubb towards the picnic table from West Tyson Mason and I decided to attack some very tricky switchbacks. First up, is my best performance of the day. This is probably my 17th try, I was able to achieve around 90% switchback domination:



Next, observe our hero Mr. Mason Storm achieve TOTAL switchback domination on his FIRST try:



Here are the fantastik Kona's we were riding that day: Nico's Unit JR....notice anything new?



Mason's BIG Unit:



Well, have fun out there in the sunshine everyone. It is safe to assume that most trails are rideable and tortally awesorme at this time. Until we meet again, take care of yourselves and "don't do anything we wouldn't do."

-Nico Toscani

13 comments:

Doctor said...

Awww man, Poo-Brown dropped a couple pounds. Was Storm high on jenkem? You can't cut down tree's with your unit! My how units have changed over the years.

Chris Wurster said...

What's new - freshly trimmed facial hair

Mason Storm said...

My unit keeps getting bigger! Robert don't get any ideas from what I just said. It's the full carbon wcs mtb fork. Dr. I was high on life...high as shit!

El Cavano said...

Mason's Big Unit is quite impressive.

Just picked up a little someting of my own last night. 9AM Inaugural ride Saturday at CW.

Oh yeah.

LC

Marc said...

I hope the hip feels better soon Matt. Looks like you guys have some great riding weather! We should really have stickers featuring Eddie's nose neighbor, I've got just the place on my head tube for one.

Doctor said...

LC if I didn't have to work I would be there. I bet you could get one of these other jerks interested though.

Doctor said...

Oh yeah, Nico's nose neighbor's fork weighs the same as Storm's road fork. WCS=WTF

Dan said...

Mr Klein/Toscani, thank you very much for donating your kidney. We hope that your compensation was adequate and that you have put it to good use. You'll be happy to know that the transplanted patient is doing well.

Casey Ryback said...

Nico, excellent write-up. Steven would be proud!

Steve Driscoll said...

I DOUBT any Seagal Team Members will show up for the Tour De Groudhog, as I hear that that MO riders are weak in the soul, and muscles. We shall see though. I know that someone with a broken leg, hip replacement and full metal jacket from the waist down (2.5 lbs of titanium & stainless) will be defending his title there. Just from what I hear, that's all.

Casey Ryback said...

Man, I could win that race with one ball tied behind my back!

Doctor said...

Due to our strict regiments of base miles, chinese herbs, beers, and taint hardening exercises, you can rest assured that the warriors of TEAM SEAGAL will completely and totally dominate your little contest

El Cavano said...

Hat's off to Nico and Mason on the switchbacks. Indeed a superior effort.

I found that stretch of trail to be a bit challenging with a 32x18.

LC