20090212

Death By Hills Ride - It's about to "drop"

I never would have thought that this town had this many suicidal people in it. But after posting this road route yesterday, thinking "it would be cool to try this year," a number of people were interested at attempting to kill themselves by flinging themselves against a hillside alongside us.

So as I type this out a 11PM, I can smell the bacon that my roommate is cooking - yes, fucking bacon at 11PM - and I think to myself "This is going to be fucking awesome." If you finish this, Energor will smile and grant you the status of "Badass;" AND you're face will do this:


So anyway, this was starting out as just 2 or 3 of us going to scope out this route for a future road hill challenge. But lots people jumped at the idea of riding this Sunday, so this piece-a-shit is a go for Sunday. If you want to go, here's the deal:

Where: Lone Wolf Coffee - corner of Kehr's Mill and Clayton Road. Check out the website for details - www.lonewolfcoffecompany.com

When: 9AM, try to be there kinda early so we don't leave late. I'd rather not be still sitting around at 9:30.

Route: See yesterday's post, or download it:
http://www.mapmyride.com/route/us/mo/wildwood/649368124166 Turns out it's about 93 miles total.

Pace: Steady but relaxed, talking pace. There isn't much distance between each hill, so let's take advantage. However, I'd rather it isn't an FBC Full Moon Fiasco pace.

Weather: Looks like a high of 38F.

This route does not go straight out for 4 hours then back for 4 hours - in other words, we should almost always be within *about* an hour of the start point if you need to bail, which some people will. Which is cool. There will also be a handful of gas stations for refuel, i.e. at Six Flags, and Wild Horse Creek/109. That being said, bring plenty of food and water 'cuz this ain't supported! There WILL also be some hills that are done as an out-and-back solely for the sake of going up that hill in paticular, so mentally prepare yourself for a few of those, a'ight? The plus side is that a few of these, like Babler Forest, will be a ball-out descent that allows you to go as fast as you will let yourself.

I must give a disclaimer - Tour de Groundhog was on our agenda, but when huge rides pop up that will have us on the bike for a longer period of time, with little/no driving and no entry fee, sometimes we just have to jump on it. Nevertheless, there WILL be a Seagal presence at TdG (thank you Nico.)

So if you still want to go, start resting now, and show up before 9 this Sunday. I mean really, how often do you get to redline yourself at 4.5 mph?

-Casey. Fucking. Ryback.

13 comments:

Mason Storm said...

What did we get ourselves into?

Casey Ryback said...

WE? You're the one who wanted to do it *this* sunday!

keeven said...

who's riding fixed?

Christian Stitz said...

If they haven't been already, we should notify Lone Wolf that we will devour their entire menu. I wonder if they have any eating challenges?

CockPuncher said...

Gentlemen, I will be taking a pass on this one. A month off the bike, a horrible cold and 94 miles of hills don't mix. Plus, I'm finishing up our cards....Puncher

Scott said...

Im rounding up a crew... we will unite Sunday morning.

Casey Ryback said...

Holy.
Shit.
This...


...is going to blow my fucking mind.

Casey Ryback said...

btw, I printed off some copies of directions (text, not a map) which can be folded into a ziploc bag if you want.

DA9DR's Amazing Blog said...

Are there room for my brains in the ziploc as well Coach? Oh and I will be riding a P-far (penny farthing for you illiterate bastards that don't read bikesnob.) and consuming nothing but red wine and cheese the entire ride.

Nico Toscani said...

Oh shit. I think I might fuck this one up.

TEAM SPACKLER said...

I am in but looks like the 45 mile point is where I will bail out and head back to the start... Not quite a big enough old boy for the full 90.

taggart said...

i'm in for 3-4 hours of pain

Peat said...

Looks like a couple of us from Team Red Wheel will be showin' up. I know this strikes fear in your heart...fear that you'll have to wait for our fat, slow asses at the top of each hill.