IntorBike 2009: Vegas, baby, Vegas

Greetings loyal Team Seagal fans. Today, I, CockPuncher, am popping my perverbial blorging cherry to inform you all of the awesomeness that was InterBike 2009 in Fabulous Las Vegas, NV. I was priviledged to receive access to this event from this dood (armed with his secret "buyers weapon," a cold 3-pack of 24oz Tecate):

The weeks events unfolded thusly....I was whisked away by Southwest Airlines via Rapid Rewards (read: FREE) ticket, along with a couple books of FREE DRINK coupons. I made great use of these enjoying several Vodka and Monster's en route to Vegas. The above dood picked me up at the airport with a couple cold beers at the ready and the party was set to begin. But first, a mandatory stop at the In & Out Burger (not on Radcliff) for a tasty two-by-four.

Monday night was filled with revelry and anticipation of the Tuesday Dirt Demo at Bootleg Canyon. We arrived at said demo site at the bewitching hour of 9:30am. I was very "dehydrated" and ready for fun in the 95-degree sun. There is NO SHADE anywhere out there, so hydration was the order of the day. Shortly upon arrival, I ran into these jerks from Momentum:

By the end of the day Tuesday, I had ridden about six different offerings from various manufacturers. I must say, that our awesome sponsors, Kona, stole the show for me. The Hei-Hei 29'er was amazing. I also got to ride a Jamis 650B full suspension, which was a lot of fun. In addition, I went with Mr. Tecate above on a ro-ad ride upon a Felt bicycle equipped with the futuristic DI2 group. It works great, but I can't help but feel it's sort of a "It ain't broke, why fix it" scenario. And for the money it costs, if I were a roadie, I'd just as soon buy Ultegra and a mountain bike.

After an amazing day of hanging out and riding a bunch of cool new bikes, I was dropped off back at the glamorous Luxor Hotel and Casino, which I called home for three nights. I went straight up to my room and passed out from exhaustion and dehydration until about 7:00pm. At this time, I made my way down to the "MORE" buffet. Yes, it's called "MORE." And judging from the massive amount of fat-asses cramming their faces with heaping helpings of all things fried, I understand why. Snort, snort..."more, let's eat more." Nevertheless, I myself gorged upon the goodness of said buffet prior to making my way to the Mandalay Bay casino floor for a bit of gaming. While there, I actually ran into two of my cousins! They were in Vegas for a 40th birthday party. So, we toasted the guy and hung out at the bar for a while before I proceeded to lose too much money at the blackjack tables. 'Nuff said.

After another long night it was time for the show. There were two highlights for me:

Gary Fisher & Eddy Merckx:

Another not-quite-as-awesome-cause-he's-a-doper* celeb was seen as well. Yes, that is a Big Shark with a Tyler Hamilton.

*ahem, alleged.

Now, on to the bikes, gear, etc:

This is a mini-tool that mounts as a quick-release lever. You'll never leave it behind!!

This is the Jamis 650B that I test rode on Tuesday.

Retrotech at the Rolhoff booth:

Our Awesome Sponsor, Kona's, Booth:

Enough, already!! On to Cross Vegas on Wednesday night where I was escorted by the Big Shark Crew:

Met Kona's Barry Wicks:

Was assaulted by the Luna Chic's Male Strippers:

Saw another familiar face to the STL cross scene:

Met the Mafia Racing crew who were kind enough to supply us with copious amounts of cold, refreshing, delicious PBR:

Holy crap that was a great freaking time. If ever the opportunity arises again, I will be there fo' sho'.

More photos are HERE..


Casey Ryback said...

"was assaulted by?" More like "I assaulted them..." amirire?

Looks like a badass time you jork!

Team Trail Monster said...

All these bad ass times had by said teammembers calls for action by left out teammembers...
Prepare to Assemble early (10-2)Friday Morning - 100 Miles of Ozark Trail (2 day trip cause there is no need to rush this goodness)
Only real Jorks need apply.

Mason Storm said...

Tyler Hamilton looks like a tan turd w/ Robortions hair style.

Craig said...

Where's the pics of the booth babes?!?!?

Dan said...

storm stole my clever idea. damnit. no cleverness. oh well, that hamilton dude made me laugh cus i thought commuter dude from big shark was with a manikin. how come all the riding pictures were so far away?

Sandbox/Gino said...

OK so I'm a little confused, Busken never has a shirt with sleeves when we see him right? Yet I clearly see sleeve created tanlines in that pic. I'm stumped.

CockPuncher said...

Dan-you should know quite well why all the riding pics are so far away...I am so f'ing slow that everyone gets way ahead of me!!

Anonymous said...

the caucasion male stripper looks like travis "yogurt" thrower. is that what he is doin' now?

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