20140113

Get Stoked.

In order to help you jerks get excited for some Jerkduro business, I thought it only appropriate to get with the "stokage" by providing you with some intense off road footage.

I haven't seen this much needless dismounting since the last time I watched the B Race in the Bubba series have to dismount over a railroad tie.


In other news, please note that our own Titward made it on Drunk Cyclist! Check it out here:

http://drunkcyclist.com/2014/01/13/compton-kills-usac-blows/

I must also say that I thoroughly approve of DC's sign-off: "Ride Bikes. Drink Beer. Go Fuck Yourself." It is worth pointing out that our motto of "Get Totally Fucked" is essentially saying the same thing.




Here is an idea - who is in for a ride this coming Sunday? At this point, the weather is looking crunk as shit, though it is a pretty good assumption that, on account of the freeze-thaw, the trails will be sloppier than a cub scout's butthole after a week at Camp Criss Angel. They'll be sloppier than a juggalo's vagina on day 3 of The Gathering. So have some skinny-ish tires ready for some not-singletrack miles. Who's down?

-Casey F. Ryback

8 comments:

Orin Boyd said...

Titward is most certainly down! Ride Bikes! Drink Beer! Go Fuck Yourself!

cockpunchOr said...

MoAr taint searing pain for me, please. I'm down like cub scout pants at Camp Criss Angel. I'm down like incomes and IQ's at the juggalo gathering: www.juggalogathering.com. I'm fucking SO down.....

Skeet Skeet said...

This Jerk is down. Might even be able to bring some dudes with me from the Il side.

le heckleur said...

perm your mullets and point your shitty minivans towards the southwest and let's crush some Crawford county gravel.
www.route66bicycles.com/get/dirty

Gino said...

Coach, please don't tell you me you haven't watched all 22+ minutes of that video!

I'm sure if you ask the recumbent guy he'll say he rides because it doesn't hurt his back. So then what in the hell is doing picking up that 100lb behemoth to lift over a fence!?

PS This is jerk is interested in taking my bicycle to a place via pedaling on sunday

Gino said...

I was apparently so worried that you watched that video Coach I was speaking gibberish...

I meant to say: please tell me you haven't watched all 22+ minutes of that recumbent video!

Doctor said...

Juggalos and schoolboys. Holy shit. Gino, you and I both know he watched the whole video. Probably twice. I am beginning to think that Crotch's professed hatred of the recumbent is a vain attempt to hide his recumbent fetish.

New East Coast Syndicate said...

Doesn't he realize that gate is to keep idiots like him off the trail. I bet the wee baby Samus could crawl up that first climb faster than he rode it.