20161211

CXMAS 2016... Make that '17

Yeah it really is happening! Or at least we've been going around digging up the bloated carcasses of Team Seagal trying to get this CXMAS thing rolling. Turns out when you maintain a high level of drinking but stop riding bikes things go down hill pretty fast. Especially when you stop putting on Non-races and fill that time with art installations of empty beer cans and bottles. Those bottles and cans just don't empty themselves.


As with all art, sometimes the artistic merit is up for debate...


So if you want to see what jerks we've raised from the dead* or maybe ride some bikes with a bunch of other people you actually like, here's what you need to know:

LOCATION
We're moving from one scenic river valley to another.
Hello Meramec River!
OK. Probably not that brotastic and definitely not that part of the Meramec.

As of right now we plan to start at or near Sherman Beach. Start location may change to somewhere else in the general area so check back on our facebook page or this highly esteemed blog.

The route will travel up and down the river valley. We will decide the final route based on weather and trail conditions leading up to CXMAS. We will likely visit Castlewood, the Al Foster, some roads like St Paul and Ridge, and maybe Bluff View. Weather permitting there will be sections of smoothish singletrack and definitely dirt river flats. I've ridden everything on 28mm road tires, but like the guy reclining on the raft in the picture above, we can't all be that cool and you will likely want some sort of tire with minimal knobs and a little more volume.

WHERE: Sherman Beach Parking Lot (probably)
WHEN: Sunday January 1, 2017, NOON start

WHAT

We will have the usual CXMAS things: eggnog, places to ride your bicycle, alcohol, and special prizes. But this year will be different in a couple of ways. We've raised money in the past for some great causes, but this year one of our own, a truly great jerk, needs our help.

The Doctor has a likely life long battle with seizures and the medical bills to prove it. Read the Doctors story here. Feel free to contribute right there if you'd like, but make sure to bring cash to CXMAS this year. For CXMAS 20167 CASH IS KING!
There will be a $5 required recommended donation. That donation will get you an entry in one of the prize drawings we will have. Bring more money though. We will have lots of other chances for you enter to win more chances and more drawings. Some prizes will be tied into other mini events within the larger CXMAS non race. BRING MORE MONEY! And don't expect us to have change. I recommend $5 bills, but if you're feeling baller we'll accept $20 bills. And if you just came back from an IL-side New Years, dollar bills will work. There is no way to win a prize without donating to a raffle.

So on 1/1/17, take some advil and come on out to Sherman Beach. We'll have the hair of the dog. And don't forgot to bring money. No matter what you donate it will still be the cheapest Doctor visit you've ever had.

Did I mention cash?


*And I'm sure you're excited to see your favorite jerks that you haven't seen in a long time, but these last few years haven't been kind to all of us...
Don't worry we actually all still look more or less lifelike with normal sized appendages.




2 comments:

New East Coast Syndicate said...

Suck donkey balls, I have to be in Virginia for a birthday party and not at this totally spectacular event. I am truly a jerk of jerks.

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